When All Else Fails, Use a Stapler
Years ago when my daughter announced, to my horror, that she wanted to be a Brownie, I led her to her first meeting with reluctance. I was happy for HER that she wanted to be part of this wonderful organization, where she’d meet new friends, learn new skills and develop a better super-ego.
But I knew that it meant new activities for me that I hate doing: baking cookies and brownies and leading activities that involve other fine motor skills that I find difficult to do. And of course, it meant being in a room full of very noisy children every Thursday afternoon at 4pm.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the whole “earning badges” aspect of being a Brownie. Or to be more specific, having to sew those cloth demons onto my daughter’s vest every time she learned a new bird whistle or saved a tree from dying.
You see, I am horrible when it comes to managing many domestic responsibilities and that includes sewing. Even replacing buttons puts me into a tizzy and I typically ask my husband or kids to take that task on.
So when I was faced with a little brown vest needing badges sewn on, I came up with a brilliant solution.
I stapled them on.
Yes, I stand here before you, admitting that I STAPLED my daughter’s Brownie badges onto her little vest. Being the good Brownie she was, she earned a LOT of badges. But I was no longer avoiding the task; I’d just grab my hand stapler and go to town.
Until one day, she came home from a meeting gushing tears.
“Mom”, she said. “The staples are digging into my skin. I can’t even sit down- I’m scratched all over!”
I don’t know who I felt worse for- my daughter with her red blotched, scraped up skin..or me and my inability to even deal with a little Brownie vest.
Sadly, she ditched Brownies the following year. Maybe she was embarrassed to show her face at the meetings, worried about any comments she might get from the crooked patches covering her vest, carefully (ahem) sewn on by her mother.
Or maybe she got sick of the generic, tasteless cookies I baked…I mean…purchased.
Unlike most mothers who worry about their children fitting in, did she know it was ME who felt I couldn’t measure up to the other moms?
But I knew that it meant new activities for me that I hate doing: baking cookies and brownies and leading activities that involve other fine motor skills that I find difficult to do. And of course, it meant being in a room full of very noisy children every Thursday afternoon at 4pm.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the whole “earning badges” aspect of being a Brownie. Or to be more specific, having to sew those cloth demons onto my daughter’s vest every time she learned a new bird whistle or saved a tree from dying.
You see, I am horrible when it comes to managing many domestic responsibilities and that includes sewing. Even replacing buttons puts me into a tizzy and I typically ask my husband or kids to take that task on.
So when I was faced with a little brown vest needing badges sewn on, I came up with a brilliant solution.
I stapled them on.
Yes, I stand here before you, admitting that I STAPLED my daughter’s Brownie badges onto her little vest. Being the good Brownie she was, she earned a LOT of badges. But I was no longer avoiding the task; I’d just grab my hand stapler and go to town.
Until one day, she came home from a meeting gushing tears.
“Mom”, she said. “The staples are digging into my skin. I can’t even sit down- I’m scratched all over!”
I don’t know who I felt worse for- my daughter with her red blotched, scraped up skin..or me and my inability to even deal with a little Brownie vest.
Sadly, she ditched Brownies the following year. Maybe she was embarrassed to show her face at the meetings, worried about any comments she might get from the crooked patches covering her vest, carefully (ahem) sewn on by her mother.
Or maybe she got sick of the generic, tasteless cookies I baked…I mean…purchased.
Unlike most mothers who worry about their children fitting in, did she know it was ME who felt I couldn’t measure up to the other moms?
Comment
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Comment by betsy davenport, phd on November 21, 2009 at 2:05pm -
This is a perfect example of how AD/HD expresses itself differently in people. I CAN SEW! Not only that, but I sewed many dresses, short sets, costumes and what-all for my daughter when she was in school..I even sewed pioneer bonnets for her classmates when they were studying the move westward. I kniotted sweaters. They fit. That is, the ones I finished before she outgrew them. I have a few on the shelf still undone because she got too big, too fast.
It was being on time for school and at the end of the day that ruined my reputation there. Ugh.
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Comment by Terry Matlen on November 20, 2009 at 4:32pm -
Fran, to be honest, I probably would have done that too!
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Comment by Fran H. on November 20, 2009 at 4:30pm -
Last year, my daughter had to have snaps sewn on her dance recital costume. I was able to do it myself, but another mother admitted taking her daughter's costume to a professional seamstress and paying for the snaps to be sewn on.
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Comment by Terry Matlen on November 19, 2009 at 10:36pm
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Love your responses, ladies!
Here's my update. The skirt came out just fine. Give me a brush anytime. Just keep those needles and irons as far away as possible!
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Comment by Margaret on November 19, 2009 at 8:23pm
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OMG!! When I was a Brownie, our badges went on the arm of our uniforms. My Mom stapled my badges on too! I remember being highly embarassed, and it was scratchy. However, I also thought it was a very creative idea.
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Comment by chocoholic on November 18, 2009 at 12:17am -
Great story! :)
Re: "Unlike most mothers who worry about their children fitting in, did she know it was ME who felt I couldn’t measure up to the other moms?" -- I can relate! My kids seem fairly well-adjusted and functional so far, thank goodness, but it sure ain't for not trying. :) Quite frankly I have to really work to stay aware so I don't inflict my social-turtle-ness, insecurities, hang-ups, etc. etc. ad nauseum, on them!
So far, I think one of the best prayers I've ever thought to pray for my kids is that God will bring people into their lives who can teach them things or help them develop in ways that I can't for whatever reason, be it my emotional baggage, shyness, lack of knowledge/skills, ineptitude, whatever. It's not that I give up on trying, but sometimes I need a little help, you know?
Good luck w/ the skirt!
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Comment by Terry Matlen on November 17, 2009 at 10:15pm
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Update, folks.
Just got word that my daughter needs a special outfit for her ballroom dancing recital. So now, instead of dealing with patches, I have to sew polka dots onto a white skirt. My plan? I bought fabric paint and a rounded sponge-tipped brush. I will let you know the results as soon as they come in. Wish me luck, gang.
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Comment by Rebekah on November 17, 2009 at 9:54pm -
Oh I relate 100% I sometimes thank God that my daughter has ADHD and doesnt have enough extra time to worry about Brownies and that my husband is more than willing to do Boy Scouts because both sound like a nightmare to me. I cant sew either, due to a visual impairment and just plain lack of eye hand coordination, so I would have stapled them on too! I feel so bad sometimes because I feel like my kids are missing so much in life because Im not capable of doing things that most moms can do....but I dont have much choice other than to do what I can and hope that its enough in the end. I dont know any kid that died from not doing Brownies.
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Comment by Belynda on November 17, 2009 at 11:18am -
I SO relate! I feel guilty that I was tremendously relieved when my daughter dropped out of Brownies after only a couple of meetings. I had gone all the way up to Seniors, myself, but my stay-at-home mom had no problem with baking and sewing as long as she didn't have to do anything too social, so badges weren't a problem. On the other hand, when my ADHHHHD son started martial arts classes and got badges to be sewn onto his uniform (can't remember how to spell the word for it), I used hot glue after I had poked enough holes in my fingers trying to get the blasted things sewn on. They are thick and hard and so was the part of the uniform where they were to go! Then, of course, my daughter started competitive dancing and there were MORE badges to be applied! Frankly, I have stacks of badges somewhere around here that never got applied because it was just too hard. Wish I had thought of a stapler!
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Comment by Lovemypirates1121 on November 17, 2009 at 11:03am -
I feel you. I don't have daughters, but my oldest was in Cub Scouts for a year and while he enjoyed it, the den meetings and pack meetings were tantamount to torture for me. Den meetings weren't so bad, really, as it was a smaller group, not as loud and the Den leader was good at keeping the kids fairly calm.
But I stink at making small talk with the other parents, especially when I have NOTHING in common with them aside from our sons being in the same den. You know the ironic thing though? Now that he's no longer in Cub Scouts, when I run into those mothers at school events or around town, it's easy to talk to them and make small talk! Go figure! LOL!
The thing I hate though is the fund raisers. I was a girl scout from Brownies-Seniors and though I loved every other aspect of being a GS, I LOATHED cookie sales and did NOT like to do them. At all. Mostly because I was a painfully shy kid and hated going door to door to ask neighbors to buy cookies. When we would set up a table outside grocery stores, I let the other girls approach shoppers to ask if they wanted to buy, though sometimes the other girls would make me ask. When I did I usually spoke so softly they didn't even hear me.
Can you see why I don't belong in sales? LOL! When it came time for my oldest to do popcorn sales, I cringed, especially when looking at the prices of some of the items in the catalog. Faith and begorrah, that stuff is EXPENSIVE and from what I've heard, most of it isn't even very good! At least Girl Scout cookies, while they've gone up a dollar since I was a scout, they're still only 3.50 a box, and they're good!
As for patches, I remember my mom ironing mine onto the vest/sash. I think she got some stuff from JoAnn Fabrics to use for that purpose.
© 2012 Created by Terry Matlen.
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