Overstimulated or Change in Schedule?
As I have said in the past, my 9 year old was diagnosed ADD. We suspect my 6 year old (both are girls) may be ADHD. We are not sure how much her not being able to be still unless in front of a computer or tv and having her volume set on "high" all the time is possible ADHD or just being 6. We have her teacher observing her closely with her class this year and see what he thinks, just to have a different opinion/point of view.
They both started school this week (4th grade and 1st grade). They both have had issues this week with not listening and the little one tends to scream and throw a fit whenever she is asked to do something she doesn't want to do. This is hard as my husband has a hard time listening to the screaming fit, and my oldest has auditory sensitivity so the little one's screaming HURTS her ears. I can deal with it unless it is first thing in the morning, then her being loud feels like shocks going through my body. I am thinking they are just having a bit of hard time adjusting to the new schedule and school starting and wondering if this is normal?
It's hard to balance out what they need, work and dealing with my own diagnosis and treatment. I have to take care of me, I get that, but it is hard when they are having a hard time of it too. How to I help my family get back to a calmer climate?
They both started school this week (4th grade and 1st grade). They both have had issues this week with not listening and the little one tends to scream and throw a fit whenever she is asked to do something she doesn't want to do. This is hard as my husband has a hard time listening to the screaming fit, and my oldest has auditory sensitivity so the little one's screaming HURTS her ears. I can deal with it unless it is first thing in the morning, then her being loud feels like shocks going through my body. I am thinking they are just having a bit of hard time adjusting to the new schedule and school starting and wondering if this is normal?
It's hard to balance out what they need, work and dealing with my own diagnosis and treatment. I have to take care of me, I get that, but it is hard when they are having a hard time of it too. How to I help my family get back to a calmer climate?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Margaret on -
Is your 9 year old being treated? If not, that may be a good place to start. However, if you are AD/HD, and so is your 9 yr old, it is a pretty good bet that your 6 yr old is as well. It sounds like it is time to get her thoroughly evaluated and assessed.
The other thing is that at 6 yrs old, she is WAY to old to throw tantrums when the world doesn't go her way. That is behavioural, and you need to make it stop. It is not fair for her - if she starts doing that at school, she is going to have a very difficult life. I'm willing to bet that until now it has been working for her, as it seems that no one at home can stand her screaming. Try explaining to her, when neither of you is upset, that you know she gets angry and frustrated, but that screaming is not the way to deal with those feelings, and give her some examples of ways that she CAN deal with them. (Make sure that Mom and Dad are NOT role modelling screaming as the way to deal with anger/frustration, or it gets really confusing for kids when we tell them that they can't!) When she starts screaming, and she will, you need to stay very calm, tell her you know she is upset, but to remember that she can't scream to deal with it, and to make a better choice by the time you count to 3. Calmly count to 3, even if she continues to scream. If she has not stopped screaming when you get to 3, then tell her that she needs to calm down to make better choices, and she needs to go to her room to calm down. Giver her as much, or as little, assisstance as she needs to get to her room, and she needs to stay there until she has calmed down. AS SOON as she is calm, go and praise her for calming down, and talk to her about why she was so upset, and what she can do to deal with those feelings more constructively. Then you need to remind her that she has broken a house rule about screaming and tantruming, and she needs a time out (6 min as she is 6 yrs old) to think about the rule that she broke. Be prepared for more screaming. Once her 6 min are up, remind her why she had a time out, hugs and kisses, and go on with life. If she is still screaming at 6 min, tell her her time is up, and once she is calm, you will come and tallk with her so she can end her time out. No one learns anything when they are screaming. As soon as she is calm, remind her why she was in time out, remind her of the better choices she can make next time, hugs and kisses, and get on with your day. If you are consistant with this, and DO NOT give in to the tantrums, the screaming fits should fade away quickly.
But definately time to get the little one assessed!!
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