Noticing Kids Delays
Do any of you have a time period where ADD in children starts to become apparent? My kids seem to hit normal milestones normally in first year, tho in hindsight had other problems. Sometimes even hit things really early. But between 1 and 2 seem to really slow down, esp. with language [all girls]. My hyper one you could really see by 2/3 yo. I'd love [and need] to hear about your versions...
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Julie on -
Im very interested in this (I notice you also have an 8 month year old like me) ...It would be nice to have a yard stick to measure ADD signs by at the earliest point.Especially as often some ADD symptoms are very similar to other conditions. I await the replies eagerly :)
-
Permalink Reply by Jen on -
This is also something I'm curious about. My two year old is becoming increasingly more active and defiant (he's 28 months). I know part of this is just his age, but my husband and I both have ADHD, and I am painfully aware of the strong genetic link. I have read and heard from others that problems typically become noticable around 6 or 7 years old. I have a 9 month old, too. I don't want to start labeling my kids too soon, but I also want to do as much as I can ahead of time to help them along the way.
-
Permalink Reply by ADDSarah on -
DS just turned 1, and he seems to hyper-focus and be off in his own world a lot. He's in daycare, and his primary teacher expressed some concerns to me last week, suggesting he's behind in everything. (However, he does many things with me, like walking while holding my hands, that he doesn't do at daycare). Because of this, the pediatrician recommended he be evaluated through First Steps. I didn't even know I had ADHD until I was about 30 (although my mom knew and assumed I did), so if I can get some help for him this early it will hopefully be a lifelong benefit!
-
Permalink Reply by silverwings002 on -
It seems to me the gap starts around a 1-ish, start seeing more and more gaps in the milestones and development. Me and my kids always do well in the beginning of the school year, everything's fresh, there's not a lot of learning already built up, so we do better, but as more is put on the plate the more the frustration builds and expectations are not met. Maybe its true in life too, things are good the first year, but as more learning is needed and pushed, the harder it gets to keep up?
Language and large motor skills were first to notice, then later it was play development and small motor skills were noticably lacking. Esp. when put in with peers.
-
Permalink Reply by Suzy on -
My ADHD son had speech delays noticed around age 2. He's also had motor delays. He's 12 and is not athetic at all. Low muscle tone, poor coordination etc. Its tough making friends when you still don't ride a bike, don't play ball or any sports. Is this somehow related to ADHD?
-
Permalink Reply by silverwings002 on
-
It certainly could be. My 7 yo has more development delays than the 12 yo had, and is way more behind in her gross motor skills as well. Did you ever do PT with him? One of the trickiest parts of ADHD is finding out the way we truly are, whether personality or physical prowess. Maybe he truly isn't capable this way naturally, and/or ADHD makes it worse...What do you think? Does he seem naturally inclined in other areas? [science, academics, swimming, great friend, writing?]
-
Permalink Reply by Cheryl W on -
I have 3 girls that are 6, 4, and 2, and I saw the 'teribble twos' and the hyper-focus actions by the time they were all about one. They all began the independance stage at the 'average' time, yet had a short shy stage, if at all. I started to see the wiggling around and/or very short focus during book time once they were on the verge of walking. They were volenteering to do things for others as soon as they could, and still do. My 6 yo loves to read, but only started to say the abc song properly about a year ago. I can see possible dyslexia in her. My 4 yo started to chew on almost everything once her teeth started to come in and still does at times. It's natural for younger siblings to have more delays than the older, but I can already tell my younger two are almost, if not for sure, at the points that the 'pros' say the docs should be advised. My 2 yo still doesn't say 'mommy' properly! I made sure to start my 6 yo on homework now, and learnt that if you give a few small, (about 5 min), breaks during homework time, the less the battle and the quicker it's done! My older two began sleeping together as soon as my 4 yo was out of the crib and about 20 months old. I've seen that people with adhd, or the close relatives of people who do, notice the signs of it much sooner than those who don't! My husband still thinks that it's 'normal' what our kids do! (I don't believe in the word normal!) I hope these are helpfull! :-)
-
Permalink Reply by Rachel M on -
We just started our newly 8 year old on ADD meds this week. It has been a big issue probably since first grade, although he also has a few sensory issues that may be difficult to separate from ADD. The only reason we decided to medicate is because he started to feel very bad about not getting all his work done in school.
I don't think that ADD has to do with gross motor skills. Our 8 year old was born short of 32 weeks gestation. The ADD and sensory stuff are things that he inherited from my family gene pool, although there may be some preemie issues in there. Although no one in my family is uncoordinated, he inherited sports ability from my husband's side of the family.
That being said, he is perhaps the most coordinated kid I have ever met. He could throw a ball in the air and hit it with a bat at 18 months old (that would have been 16 months if he had been on time). He rode a tricycle WELL at 16 months. He did have some fluidity issues with his ice skating for the first few years he skated, but he now skates better than I ever will because he plays hockey 5 times a week. If I had to pick a career for him it would be in athletics. He would make a great ski instructor, hockey player, baseball player...even a great sports announcer.
His fine motor skills have never been great, but he does have beautiful handwriting. He never loved to draw as a toddler or child, but when he did it was great with a lot of detail. I don't think he wanted to put the time into the details he felt needed to be there.
I am starting to feel like he is having trouble with friends. He is complaining that all of the other 2nd graders still play imagination games and he hates them. He started playing with the 4th graders in kindergarten because they played sports. He just needs the concrete play. I can understand that since I never like imaginary play.
I think ADHD is easier to spot at times than ADD. I often wonder if our 4 year old has ADHD since he is often just absolutely uncontrollable. Even my father, the psychiatrist, told me I should medicate him after visiting us for a weekend. He was half kidding, but the kid is exhausting. Ironically, I think he is the one without it. Once he has school and studies to fixate on instead of bothering his brothers I think he will be a new kid.
-
Permalink Reply by Melissa on -
With me having ADHD I always wondered if he would. He would cry for an hour while I walked around singing to him before he fell asleep at night. At 2 months he had to be carried around (would NOT stay in a carrier), and prefered facing out on the snuggly so he saw everything I saw and could feel the movement of us walking (yep he was in a snuggly from the early morning till night except for nap), carrier was ok only if I carried it.
He took a morning nap and afternoon nap - and had to go to sleep at that exact time - if I tried putting him down 15 minutes late then he might not sleep because he was so upset, and he had to eat at exactly noon - If we were out and busy and I didn't notice nap or lunch time then I paid because his behaviour became so extremely cranky :(
He started talking at 9months and hasn't stopped yet!!! There was never a speech delay, even with his meds now he still isn't able to go for a minute without talking or making sounds (even if he is in a room alone, lol) - although he is well behaved and very shy, very quiet at school - the meds helped him become a little less shy at school. In kindergarten they kept saying he didn't have any problems - but that he really needed to work on printing and cutting. In grade 1 (with lowest dose meds), he was doing horrible with printing - it was not up to par with his classmates and he would turn in work that was wrong (even though he knew how to do it) or not finished (and they had lots of time left). Now (with a couple higher doses) his printing isn't perfect but much better, and he commonly finishes work and with a 1-on-1 repeat of instructions he is able to do the work properly.
He has jumped many reading levels this year already and is average for mid-gr1 level reading, so no delays - then again I started reading novels in kindergarten (it was and still is my hyper focus).
Socially he argues/is bossy with kids that he knows, and is too shy to talk to kids he doesn't know. When he was younger if we showed up at the park and it was busier than he expected he would want to leave - I would make him sit and I would point out places where only a couple kids where and after about 15minutes he would run off and be fine.
The extreme tantrums started by 2 years old and ended with the second increase in meds this year (grade 1). We did not have a real relationship prior to this year - it consisted of him running around without thinking at all and me screaming till I was crying. If I said NO, then I did not change my mind but my son would still ask 20 times, then have a tempertantrum, then not understand why he was in time out. People would tell me that I must be giving in sometimes and he was thinking this behaviour was how to get me to say yes - but I wouldn't give in once I said no.
He also had extreme frustration - if he couldn't do something then he would flip out, full tantrum (I mean for things he wanted to do himself - like draw a picture of a dog - if he tried twice and it wasn't a dog then he would flip out).
I don't think there was ever a point where I thought this was a perfectly normal child - those are the ones asleep in their carriers while mom has coffee with friends or the ones who sit in a booth at the restaurant without crawling on the floor tripping waitresses or screaming their heads off while getting themselves out of the highchair (no I did not go to restaurants often, lol).
I will mention that the past few months have become really good for us with him on meds, the tantrums stopped and I've stopped screaming :) I had friends telling me to medicate him at 4 yo, but I didn't want him on meds so early and I regret now that I didn't do it since we haven't had side effects from them (except lower lunch appetite).
-
Permalink Reply by Rachel M on
-
Melissa,
Your son sounds almost exactly like my soon to be 5 year old. He was a fabulous infant though. The behavior really kicked in at about 17 months. It started with the running and moved to the tantrums.
When he is having his good days (maybe about once every 3 months if we are lucky) it all is turned off for the day. He is that perfect child on those days. Our son does make friends with peers easily, but he is often with older kids because he has an 8 year old brother and he doesn't do well on the playground after school. There is a crew of kids that like to get him "going."
I wanted to see how kindergarten goes before trying medication. His teachers in pre-k have said he is great, although he has started a bit of tantrums for them and leaving the classroom since winter break. I am always going to make sure he is placed in the most structured classroom every year. Unfortunately I am not the most structured parent...probably due to my ADD. I am patient and sometimes too laid back. I am very patient though. I am as a parent and I was as a teacher. The kids can scream for hours in the car and I could care less, my husband reaches his boiling point with that before they even get to a full scream. Our middle one has full tantrums, that look like seizures really, particularly if he doesn't win things.
My father (a psychiatrist) jokingly said my 4 year old should be on meds after his last visit. I just think it is too young in his case.
On the positive side I feel that kids like this have a drive for success. He will never be second, he will probably never get a B....he has to be first and the best. He will not be living in my basement at age 25. My oldest (with diagnosed ADD) is the most wonderful and giving child. He just is great and is loved by all, but he doesn't have the drive to succeed and to be number one. He may be living in our basement at 25 if we don't get him going in the exact right direction and give him some momentum. At least he will be great company if he is living with us forever! :)
Melissa said:With me having ADHD I always wondered if he would. He would cry for an hour while I walked around singing to him before he fell asleep at night. At 2 months he had to be carried around (would NOT stay in a carrier), and prefered facing out on the snuggly so he saw everything I saw and could feel the movement of us walking (yep he was in a snuggly from the early morning till night except for nap), carrier was ok only if I carried it.
He took a morning nap and afternoon nap - and had to go to sleep at that exact time - if I tried putting him down 15 minutes late then he might not sleep because he was so upset, and he had to eat at exactly noon - If we were out and busy and I didn't notice nap or lunch time then I paid because his behaviour became so extremely cranky :(
He started talking at 9months and hasn't stopped yet!!! There was never a speech delay, even with his meds now he still isn't able to go for a minute without talking or making sounds (even if he is in a room alone, lol) - although he is well behaved and very shy, very quiet at school - the meds helped him become a little less shy at school. In kindergarten they kept saying he didn't have any problems - but that he really needed to work on printing and cutting. In grade 1 (with lowest dose meds), he was doing horrible with printing - it was not up to par with his classmates and he would turn in work that was wrong (even though he knew how to do it) or not finished (and they had lots of time left). Now (with a couple higher doses) his printing isn't perfect but much better, and he commonly finishes work and with a 1-on-1 repeat of instructions he is able to do the work properly.
He has jumped many reading levels this year already and is average for mid-gr1 level reading, so no delays - then again I started reading novels in kindergarten (it was and still is my hyper focus).
Socially he argues/is bossy with kids that he knows, and is too shy to talk to kids he doesn't know. When he was younger if we showed up at the park and it was busier than he expected he would want to leave - I would make him sit and I would point out places where only a couple kids where and after about 15minutes he would run off and be fine.
The extreme tantrums started by 2 years old and ended with the second increase in meds this year (grade 1). We did not have a real relationship prior to this year - it consisted of him running around without thinking at all and me screaming till I was crying. If I said NO, then I did not change my mind but my son would still ask 20 times, then have a tempertantrum, then not understand why he was in time out. People would tell me that I must be giving in sometimes and he was thinking this behaviour was how to get me to say yes - but I wouldn't give in once I said no.
He also had extreme frustration - if he couldn't do something then he would flip out, full tantrum (I mean for things he wanted to do himself - like draw a picture of a dog - if he tried twice and it wasn't a dog then he would flip out).
I don't think there was ever a point where I thought this was a perfectly normal child - those are the ones asleep in their carriers while mom has coffee with friends or the ones who sit in a booth at the restaurant without crawling on the floor tripping waitresses or screaming their heads off while getting themselves out of the highchair (no I did not go to restaurants often, lol).
I will mention that the past few months have become really good for us with him on meds, the tantrums stopped and I've stopped screaming :) I had friends telling me to medicate him at 4 yo, but I didn't want him on meds so early and I regret now that I didn't do it since we haven't had side effects from them (except lower lunch appetite).
-
Permalink Reply by Suzy on
-
Yes, my son has been in OT 2 summers and this past year.. I can't really tell if its helped. He hasn't been in PT. All motor skills are delayed or weak including singing/ carrying a tune. I'm not sure how much can be done about all that. The meds do seem to help with school but it does take him about 3 hours to do his homework and I need to help quit a bit.
silverwings002 said:It certainly could be. My 7 yo has more development delays than the 12 yo had, and is way more behind in her gross motor skills as well. Did you ever do PT with him? One of the trickiest parts of ADHD is finding out the way we truly are, whether personality or physical prowess. Maybe he truly isn't capable this way naturally, and/or ADHD makes it worse...What do you think? Does he seem naturally inclined in other areas? [science, academics, swimming, great friend, writing?]
-
Permalink Reply by Rachel M on
-
My son was also in OT, but that is completely unrelated to his ADD. Both of my siblings were in OT as children, but only my brother is ADD. I consider his ADD and his sensory things both things he inherited from my side of the family. Being a 31 week preemie has just complicated things a bit.
© 2012 Created by Terry Matlen.
